“What do you want to be when you grow up?” Remembering answering that question when you were young? It’s amazing how much we try to create a path for ourselves and yet life unfolds, things change, and sometimes we find ourselves doing things we never imagined.

I think the first thing I wanted to be was a nun! It’s true. I went to Catholic School so the nuns were really my first role models outside of my parents. That dream faded after 4th grade math with Sister Catherine who was about as crotchety as they come! After that I think I wanted to be a lawyer because I enjoyed getting into debates with my friends in high school. Then when I went to college I started getting into social issues and working with people who had been abused. Eventually I found myself in grad school and got my masters in counseling psychology. For the next 10 years I worked with high-risk youth; right up until my son was born. After his diagnosis my life changed (in so many ways!). I stayed home and started to create a very different life for myself. Bruz Wear was born and I dove into being a mother. I never thought I would be running my own business. I knew nothing about business, fashion, or anything of the like. Admittedly this little business has taken me a long time to figure out and grow. We are still growing but I guess the good news is in this economy we are still around and have an awesome customer base.

All along this journey I have also loved taking pictures. Of course I started out mostly with my own family but in the last year I broke out of my comfort zone and started taking pictures for other people. In all honesty I have been very hesitant to call myself a photographer but guess what, I am and I love it.

Life evolves. Our paths change. I believe we need to have passion and direction while being open to what the universe has in store for us. Don’t be afraid to take chances and step out of your comfort zone. I know I am still evolving and I am grateful for the opportunity to do so.

Be The Voice

I started this business 5 years ago to create something for my son and for other kids like him. Something that might provide him comfort and support; something as simple as a pair of pants. Through this company I have been able to connect with parents around the world. I have not made a dime of profit but I have heard some of the kindest accolades from people grateful for a little extra help in their journey with hemophilia or just parenting in general. For this, and for all I have learned, I am so grateful.

Today I sit here in disgust with what I read in the last 24 hours. I realize I am late in the game from when this story broke but I knew once I allowed myself to read the details it would take a lot for me to unwind the sadness and refocus on the happiness in life. Last night, my husband and I read about what is happening in more detail at Penn State. Say what you will, for me this story is not about did they do the right thing, it’s a matter of did they do enough. In the last 24 hours I cannot erase that image from my mind about what this man witnessed another man doing to a child. To a child! How does one live with themselves after seeing such a thing. Sure you can say he went to the authorities but for years after this man was still working, walking around campus, and working with children. How could he think to himself this was a one-time thing and even if it was, how could he think it was okay for him not to be disciplined for his actions.

I am writing today to tell you to please, BE THE VOICE. I feel so strongly that it is our duty in life to stand up for what is right, especially when someone else can’t. All politics aside, I think we can all agree that all people, and especially children, should be treated with love and not ANY form of abuse. I can think of incidences right now in my life where I have seen adults turn a blind eye. I am not talking about abuse but situations none-the-less where an adult voice is needed and yet they don’t want to say anything. All too often, people are afraid of speaking up.

I was so incredibly fortunate to grow up in a family where speaking your mind was taught and honored. I also went to an incredible private high school in Pennsylvania (Germantown Academy) where we had monthly town meetings on various topics. People stood up to say what they thought. People discussed and sometimes argued but we were taught to do speak out in a respectful and courageous manner. When you had something to say, you stood up and spoke. That is how it should be.

In the Penn State situation, these people in my opinion did not do enough. They spoke out on one level but perhaps did not follow up to the point of stopping what was happening. You might ask, do we have the power to do that? Yes we do. One of my favorite quotes from James Baldwin is “For these are OUR children. We will all profit or pay for what they become.” In my opinion, it is our God given duty to protect the innocent. Make life better for our children. Make the world safer and cleaner than how it was perhaps for us. I am not saying that through Bruz Wear I have changed the world. But this small act was for the betterment of children with hemophilia and beyond. Let us all be motivated by making things better.

I dedicate this post to all those children who suffered because of this neglect. The children from the Penn State abuse and children who are abused every day. I pray that we as adults learn to speak up for those who can’t. I hope that more people set their sights on doing things for the betterment of our world and our children, beyond the almighty dollar, the number of wins, the press. Do what is right. Be the voice.

Join Bruz Wear and lots of awesome little hikers at the Colorado Mountain Mama’s Spring Fling. Great sales and great people. Come check it out. Monday April 21 at the Audubon Center at Chatfield Resevoir.

Spring Fling! Monday, March 21 10:00 to 1:00 Audubon Center at Chatfield Free and Open to the Public… Everyone’s Welcome! Come celebrate Spring with Mountain Mamas! Hike the short half-mile trail at your own pace and meet with naturalists along the way! Activities for kids in the Audubon Nature Center Visit our vendor booths for special deals, and PRIZES GALORE! The Wildlife Experience Bruzwear Kelty Mile High Mamas 10 Minute Massage by Bella Waves Sanborn Western Camps LifeLessons Infant CPR Classes Please consider bringing $2 as a donation to the Denver Audubon Society. They are so gracious to host this event and offer their volunteers! Directions to Audubon Center From the C-470/Wadsworth Exit, go south on Wadsworth Blvd. about 4.4 miles. (Drive past the entrance to the Park.) Turn left (east) on Waterton Road. Immediately turn left into the first parking lot at the Audubon Center sign. Happy Trails, All of us at Colorado Mountain Mamas

Before taking my kids to school this morning I was thinking to myself how funny it is that from the waist up in my car, I look dressed but the truth is almost every day I drop them off in my pajamas. Usually this is not a problem, as I drive up, open the car door, give hugs and words of encouragement, and off we go back home to get myself ready for the day. You see from the time I rise my focus, like most moms, is on my kids- making sure they are washed & dressed, getting their breakfast ready, packing lunches, and every other day giving my son a shot. It’s a lot to squeeze in and generally the only pleasure I have for myself is the much-needed cup of coffee that gives me the energy to do all these tasks in a limited amount of time.

Much to my surprise, this morning I got busted! I dropped of the kids and was heading out of the school when I noticed the 4th and 5th graders had kicked their soccer ball across the street. I saw them all staring at the ball from the fence, pleading for someone to stop and help them. I decided I would love to be their hero. I slowed down and told one of the boys, I would let him cross. Well being the good kid he is, he said he was not allowed to leave campus and asked if I would get it for him. Sure, I thought to myself, no problem. I pulled into the driveway across the street, parked my car, opened my door and looked down at my brightly colored Christmas tree pajamas! I smiled knowing there was no way to retreat now. There were about 40 kids cheering at the fence yelling, “thank you”, “you’re the best”, “punt it” and of course “nice pajama pants!” I laughed on the inside and the out. Not only did the kids see me but so did all the parents in the cars I was stopping to return the ball. It was classic especially because this is the kind of school where most parents look their best, even if just for drop off. I laughed and waived and thought laughing at yourself is a great way to start the day!

One of my most favorite quotes from a song is, “And the best thing you’ve ever done for me, is to help me take my life less seriously. It’s only life after all!” (Indigo Girls)

Have a wonderful day!

All of us, no matter what we do in life, feel stress. How we deal with it sometimes separates the sane from the insane. The stress we feel can inspire us to get things done but can also really tap our strength. It’s important in the crazy and fast paced world we live in to figure out how to recharge. For me it’s yoga. I found yoga in my 20’s when my orthopedic said I could no longer run because of the disc damage in my lower back. This news came as a shock to me, to be so young and not be able to do something any more, especially something so simple as running. Sure I could run in a pick-up game of softball but any hopes of running a second 10K was out of the question.

At that point in my athletic career, I actually enjoyed running verses being told to run by my coaches. Needless-to-say, I had to find another outlet and yoga was my answer. It helped me on so many levels~ mind, body, and spirit. I joke that I love yoga so much that I could sell it. It really has changed my life- how my body feels and looks, and how I deal with stress. Yoga has been a way for me to recharge and summon strength when I feel extremely tapped out by all the stresses in life. Whatever works for you, find your thing and stick to it. Don’t deprive yourself of ways to rejuvenate your soul. It’s so important for you and for those around you. I would love to hear what works for you. Please feel free to share!

Thanks to a special guest blogger and Bruz Wear Friend for this post…..

My daughter was tested for a bleeding disorder when she was born. Her test was negative. My husband and I were overjoyed.

She was an active baby, who crawled early, and of course wanted to pull herself up early as well. One day at my son’s karate class, she bumped her mouth on the chair she was using to pull herself up. Her mouth bled for a minute or two, but it seemed to stop.

Much to our surprise it didn’t stop, it kept bleeding and seeping. We went into to see the pediatrician. She told us that the mouth is vascular and can bleed like crazy. Apparently my daughter had busted her frenulum, which was an awful place and kids with this type of injury can bleed a lot from it.

The next day we went to the ER after being unhappy with that day’s wait at the pediatrician’s office. They wanted to test for the VonWillibrand’s Disease. They chose a pretty handy nurse to draw the blood, and yet it still took a sickening three or four minutes for them to find a vein. My baby was so upset, as you can imagine. Hours go by, they tell us that in fact, yes it looks like she has VonWillibrands Disease but they need to run one more panel for them to know for sure.

At this point my daughter was so exhausted and traumatized. The non-pediatric staff at this local hospital was just a nightmare. I wish at this point I had heeded my instincts which told me to call the Hemophilia Center (HC) and go there, or at least have them call the hospital where we were, but I discounted my feeling; in retrospect that was stupid, stupid, stupid.

Next step they wanted to cauterize her mouth. This means putting a burning q-tip onto the affected area to create a scab. For about 20 minutes they tried to do this, with no success. I asked them to try amicar. It is a topical, non-invasive, won’t cause any physical pain, and should help form a clot. My words were like the pitter-patter of raindrops on a spring day. Pretty to look at but mostly totally ignored. I offered my cell phone to the doc…started begging him to call the HC for better guidance. In retrospect I should have uttered, you’re fired and swept her up, and drove her there myself. In the future I will do exactly that.

It got worse before it got better; they needed more blood before we could go. I said fine, but it needs to be someone with experience with babies. They had a phlebotomist come down from the NICU. Another disaster… seriously he wiggled the needle around, in and out, for no exaggeration 12 minutes. My baby was a mess, a total mess; it was awful. We found out later that the reason they needed more blood was they lost the remainder of the first draw!

Finally the ER doc called the HC to get a dosage for amicar, and she finally stops bleeding. We had one more hurdle, since they feared anemia they wanted one more blood draw. They wanted to see if or how much her bleeding onset anemia had progressed. I smiled and said we are all set thanks.
I spoke to the pediatrician the next day and agreed to a blood check in two weeks but only at the HC. At that appointment her levels were normal.

My daughter is now almost a year old. We have come a long way with knowing where to go and who we can trust for a stick. These days our worries are around bumps and bruises. She has the severe version of the disease so protecting her is very important. At one of our visits to the Hemophilia Center, a kind nurse handed me a card for Bruz Wear. I immediately bought six pairs and as a result her legs have been spared from so many bruises and contusions. Without these little padded pants, she may have had to undergo many more sticks and infusions. As a result, I have chosen to only dress her in padded pants.

At the last check up the HC pediatrician could not believe how wonderful her legs looked. She does bruise and could use a padded vest sometimes I feel. To be honest I am afraid to put her into a dress, and the few times, (Christmases, Birthdays, Special days) I have tried she has gently told me “I am not a princess” (they are simple dresses not ornate at all.) She wants her pants and a shirt. I think she likes to wear the pants because they allow her to do more. She loves to plop down on her knees, like most kids do normally. When she is in PJ’s sometimes she will exclaim “ouch”, then, “I need a boo-boo buddy”. She loves her padded pants and they keep her tender legs safe.

I know she is not a princess per say; she is my much-loved toddler, who loves to wear her padded pants and play around like any other active child. I hope other parents will learn from reading this to follow their instincts, stand up for what they feel is right, and do what they need to do to protect their children. Whether it’s standing up to a doctor or making them comfortable.

For fall of this year I got to spend a week with my family in Breckenridge. It was magnificent but we were not altogether prepared. We left thinking it would be fall weather- leaves changing, leaves falling, nice breeze, 40-60 degree temperatures. We obviously did not check the weather channel before we left home. The day after we arrived it started to snow and did not stop for 3 straight days. By the 3rd day my husband had to leave to get back to work, so the kids and I were left to spend the next 3 days with no car and no winter gear. We had lots of games, technical equipment such as a computer and some I-touch’s, and access to a warm and lovely swimming pool, but we spent a lot of time in nothing more than a glorified hotel room. Even though I had my laptop, I was not about to spend another $20 on wifi.

So there we were in a position to really let go. For the kids it was not so difficult. My children happen to be very creative and low maintenance so they can entertain themselves very easily. I, on the other hand, had a tough time at first. I was very tempted to have my husband pick us up early and just head home. I kept thinking of all the things I could and should be doing. Letting go is not easy! We all want and need time off but then when we really have it, it’s hard to unwind. I allowed myself to feel what I was feeling and was determined to embrace the situation. We played a lot of Uno, we swam every day for a week, we took pictures, watched movies, and I organized 8 years of pictures!! Now that is an accomplishment! Looking back I am so glad we did not go home. I had the best time just hanging out with my kids and I know if we were at home we would not have had such special memories because I would have been caught up in the responsibilities of daily life. Moral of the post- enjoy what you have and take time to really slow down. It feels good!

Last night I finally got to see the documentary “Race to Nowhere”. I would HIGHLY recommend every parent, every teacher, every administrator, and every lawmaker see this film. I thought going in it was going to talk about how kids today are so over scheduled and have little time for themselves to actually be kids. That is very much a part of the message, and so much more. What stuck out the most to me is the stress and anxiety that kids today feel to keep up. It seems as if the pendulum swung from normal amounts of homework to a ton in order for schools and teachers to comply with new laws and standards (specifically the “No Child Left Behind Act”). Perhaps the folks who wrote this act were well intentioned, thinking that by raising expectations for all kids, that all kids would be successful. In theory that sounds fine but it works to the contrary if everyone has to fit into the same little box of excellence. It seems the results and effects from this act where/are much different. I worked in Denver Public Schools for 8 years as a counselor of high-risk youth and the longer I was there, the more I heard from staff “we just have too much to do and so little time to get it done.”

Classrooms today, kids today, are different. You can’t sit back and say these kids have it easy, “I remember when I was in high school and we were just fine with tests and homework.” It is a different age. I am 38 years old, so high school for me was just 20 years ago. I played sports every season for 4 years and was taking honor level classes. I never remember the stress that these kids talked about in the film. Perhaps it was my parents or the kind of education I was exposed to, but none-the-less the stakes today seem much higher. According to the film, we are trying to prepare 100% of our high school graduates to go to college when only 20% of the jobs require college education. We are setting them up for failure. What is the standard of success these days- is it wealth, fancy cars, and big homes? To some degree it is and it’s the job of us parents to keep that in check if we feel that is not the most important thing in life to strive for. That is not an easy challenge when kids are being bombarded with messages to the contrary.

For many reasons what sent me home wanting to hug and squeeze my kids was the sadness that many of them feel and the unneeded levels of stress and anxiety. My oldest falls victim to that. In fact, before I left for the movie, she was in tears over learning her times tables. She has to get 24 correct in under a minute and for her that is a challenge. She is much more right brained and creative (case in point her self-imposed project this week has been making a bird house out of cardboard and she loves every minute of it). For her, regurgitating these math facts does not come naturally. I worry about the stress she feels around the test and how badly she feels afterward when she does not pass and “all the other kids do”. I worry about her stress levels and how it can manifest. The movie talked about suicide and the increase of depression among today’s youth. I have been touched by suicide in my personal life. I lost my cousin not long ago and was first exposed to this in 8th grade when my friend’s mom took her life. The rate of suicide and depression among young people is on the rise. Colorado in fact ranks in the top 10%. It’s awful and yet the schools are cutting mental health support and adding more to these kid’s already full plates.

I am going to talk to my kid’s school in the next few days about these new insights and see how I can help be an advocate for change. My 3rd grader should not be in tears over math. She should be making birdhouses and enjoying her childhood. That is not to say she should not be challenged and expected to learn and work hard- please don’t take this and twist it. Our kids are feeling a lot of stress that we did not feel- anxiety, ulcers, panic attacks. We need to do something different! Please check out the film and help spread the word. I would love to hear your thoughts. Go hug your children and let go a little bit from keeping up with the Jones’s. They are all gifted and talented in their own unique way and we need to embrace that and celebrate that!

The Following Post was written by Guest Blogger, Alison Daggett

In the trailer for the upcoming documentary “Race to Nowhere” produced by Vicki Abeles, she depicts kids today as being “pushed to the brink” in a “high stakes, high pressure culture” within our education system that is gravely effecting their lives.  Furthermore, these stressed out kids are dealing with depression, disengagement, and overall unhappiness in their lives.  In conjunction with Abeles’ film comes the fact that kids may be over-scheduled in their daily lives in and outside of school that could possibly be contributing to these factors as well.

Scheduling your kid for extracurricular activities allows them to discover what they are good at, and instills some wonderful qualities like time management, leadership, teamwork, etc.  I started playing competitive sports at a very young age.  Starting at age 7, we were constantly traveling throughout the state and beyond.  Although these times produced most of my best childhood memories, there were few times where I wish that someone would have sat me down and said that it was okay if I needed to skip a practice or a workout here and there, and that I would still be able to reach my goals despite needing to take some time for a breather.  Since it should still be about doing something because you love to do it, being aware of a child’s exhaustion and stress level will clue you into whether they may be taking on too much at one time.  After all, building character qualities is far better than building a bio.

In Abeles’ documentary, a young girl says she was taught that “If you don’t earn a lot of money, something went wrong.”  The fact that our kids are being taught to achieve “the most” at such a young age is a little scary.  It seems as though sometimes we are forgetting that kids need to have the chance to be a kids without the added pressures of thinking like an adult.  Sometimes playing a game of kickball with friends or running around the house like a maniac should be the only thing that they are worried about.  There is plenty of time for them to worry about grades, or excelling at sports or music, but they shouldn’t be so overwhelmed that they miss out on the naiveté of being a kid.

A woman in Abeles’ film puts it best when she says, “I believe that our children are going to sue us for stealing their childhoods.”  Allowing kids to come up for a gulp of air once in awhile may avoid many of the stresses of their busy lives, as well as your own!

Thanks to Guest Blogger Alison Daggett on her insight on Over-Scheduling Children

A few weeks ago a life was lost. A young man by the name of Fran Crippen died in a 10K open water swim in Dubai. I did not know Fran but he went to my high school and swam competitively in a program that I once dabbled in myself. From everything I have been reading, Fran was an amazing young man. He was kind, loving, and an amazing athlete. He trained with the best and impacted many lives in the swimming world and beyond.

For so many reasons I cannot stop thinking of this incident and of Fran. As a mother, I feel so sad for his parents. When I think of my daughters, I think of how sad his 3 sisters must feel for losing their brother. I am sad for all his friends and coaches and everyone who loved him.

The last article I read about had some information from one of his sisters. She said Fran was very concerned about the conditions of this international event and was writing to the authorities prior to the event. The question remains, how and why did he die? They found his body close to the finish line but he never did make it. According to some other articles, the weather was extremely hot, as was the water, and many other athletes had issues after the event ended. I am sure the authorities are looking into this but I have to wonder why was nothing done to protect these athletes? I know he did not die in vein so what are we to learn from this?

For one thing, it sounds like he really had some reservations prior to the event. I think we are often put in situations where we are not comfortable but what do we do about it? More often than not, we muddle through and reflect afterward. Fran did not have the chance to do this. Have you ever done something you knew was wrong or that you wished you hadn’t and then just thanked God afterward that you made it through okay. What if you were about to board an airplane but had a very sick feeling in your gut? There must be a fine line between acting on every fear and stepping up to say “no” when something really isn’t right.

I am so very sorry for the loss of this amazing young man. I know his legacy will live on at our high school, in the swimming world, and for all people who were touched by his life.